save my marriage

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Save Your Marriage - Get a Free Relationships eBook for a Donation of Any Amount

Hello everyone. These are two books that I think you should have on your shelf (or on your computer, Android or Kindle).

The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage is my most popular book and it covers the basic important stuff like no other book.

Putting the Forever Back in Love is a follow up to The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage.

Putting the Forever Back in Love has advanced strategies. If you have been married for more than 10 years and your marriage is in trouble, this is the book you will want to read.

If you have kids and want to have some advanced insights and strategies for parenting, then Putting the Forever Back in Love is definitely going to be on your shipping list.

Now here is the good part!

Remember that I have a long standing offer. You can get any one of my ebooks sent to you by email as a token of my appreciation when you make a donation of any amount.

Many people don't know that I am a volunteer. I buy the airtime and internet time in order to be there to help people. Sooooooooo, any donation (yes, even a small donation like $2 is really appreciated by me).

So to take advantage of this offer, get a free eBook, and help keep this blog going--all at the same time--just click here and choose a book. Then make a donation of any amount at safe and secure Paypal and you will get your gift eBook right away!!!

As soon as Paypal notifies me of your donation, I'll send an email asking you which book you would like. Then I send the eBook as a pdf attachment to an email so you can start reading right away.

Click here to preview and choose a book.

Why do couples argue?
How can we put the sparkle back in our marriage?
How can we communicate better? What is the difference between courtship and casual dating?
My wife asked me to leave.
Why are men the way we are?
What does my wife want?
Can we reconcile?
My wife cheated on me – now what?

Based on 25 years of counseling couples and answering questions on the radio. Roland tackles the tough questions with humor, discernment, and refreshing honesty. From the Garden of Eden to the 21st century, he’s got relationships covered.

Click here to preview the paperback edition at Amazon.com

"Roland, thank you so much for your book.
When I heard that you are a pastor, I hesitated to order it because I'm not into religion. But because I wanted to learn more about why I can't stop resenting my husband so much, I went ahead and got the book. I'm so glad that I did. The advice is very practical, and the book is filled with some beautiful spirituality too. I spent over a thousand dollars to register and fly to an out of town seminar I could have saved the thousand and got your book instead." Suzy - San Bernardino

Now available in Kindle!

Putting the Forever Back in Love - Advanced Concepts in Relationship Building

Click here to preview at Amazon.com in Kindle edition

This book contains advanced concepts for coping with and resolving difficult relationship issues.

If you liked The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage you will love this book.

Been married for many years and have some issues? This is the book for you.

Based on 25 years of research and counseling, Dr. Trujillo presents new insights and strategies for healing relationships and resolving stress and unhappiness. Partners, parents, couples considering marriage, and adult children of dysfunctional families will find both practical and spiritual principles to help them move forward to happiness.

Read an excerpt from the preface:

I am both a counselor and a spiritual care giver. I care about relationships and I also care about the spiritual side of life. The reader will find down to earth common sense relationship advice intermingled with references to God, the story of the Garden of Eden, and both Christian virtues, and perennial philosophy principles such as forgiveness, patience, compassion and gentleness spoken of in all faith traditions.

I say things the way I see them, and it is my hope that my forthrightness and unabashed love for God will not be an impediment, but will be a breath of fresh air and an occasion to think outside the box.

Adam didn't do what he know in his heart was right. Instead he listened to the suggestions of another.

Now how about today? Do we not all listen more to what others say than to our intuition? We doubt ourselves and follow experts. We are subject to the spoke word. How about you men – do you do what your wife says and walk around on egg shells, or do you do what you know is right in your heart? Is your wife in charge of everything around your place?

Adam, you see, not only became subject to the spoke word, but also to his wife.

Ladies, do you have a weak man? Would you like him to be the noble knight that you hoped he would be when you married? Instead your support of him only made him weaker, more beastly, and spoiled. Does he look to you for support instead of standing on his own two feet? Does he go off to the bar, gambling, or another woman, and then come crawling back?

Everywhere women are suffering because of the weakness of men. Kids are suffering because their dad was not there for them. And even decent people, who seem to have happy marriages or relationships, are often secretly unhappy. He feels trapped. She feels unloved.

There. Have I gotten your attention? Read on and you may discover the truth that sets you free from the subtle errors.

How true it was when Henry David Thoreau said: 'Most people lead lives of quiet desperation.-

Well, take heart. It doesn't have to be that way. There are answers and solutions that really work. But like I said, you need to be willing to stop the blame game for awhile, and be willing to see where you might be erring. If so, my book and my audio lectures will be a breath of fresh air. You might even ride off into the sunset together and live happily ever after."

Want Putting the Forever Back in Love in paperback? Click here to see it at Amazon

"Roland, thank you so much for your book.
When I heard that you are a pastor, I hesitated to order it because I'm not into religion. But because I wanted to learn more about why I can't stop resenting my husband so much, I went ahead and got the book. I'm so glad that I did. The advice is very practical, and the book is filled with some beautiful spirituality too. I spent over a thousand dollars to register and fly to an out of town seminar I could have saved the thousand and got your book instead." Suzy - San Bernardino

"The perfect book for troubled couples with different type of problems . . .
I can assure it will be one of the better books I have ever read." review of The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage

Get a free eBook and help keep this blog going--all at the same time--just click here and choose a book. then make a donation at safe and secure Paypal and you will get your gift eBook right away!!!

You'll benefit from Dr. Roland's 25 years of experience. Plus his books are a good read.

You'll also be saving up to 80% off retail price.

When you send a donation to help Roland, you are actually paying forward to help others. Roland volunteers his time to help others and he frequently gives materials away free to people who can't afford anything.

Roland, Which of your Relationships Books Should I get First?

14:10:00 how to heal my relationship husband and me fight save my marriage the high cost of divorce we argue all the time why do couples argue why do marriages fail Add Comment

Roland, which of your relationships books should I read first?

A. Thank you for your great question.

Many people are searching the Internet about a relationship or marriage issue and find my Healing Relationships website. They read one of my blog posts, and it has the ring of truth to it. So they read some more posts, perhaps listen to me on Blogtalk radio and look inside a book or two.

They want to work on their relationship and also want some in depth answers to relationship issues and so they decide to get one of my books and start reading.

Here is a little guideline

If this is the first book of mine you are about to read and you want to understand the basics, then I recommend you start with The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage.

If you are purchasing two books - one for yourself and one for your partner - try starting with The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage

If you are purchasing a book for someone else - who you think would benefit from reading it, like maybe your grown son or daughter, or perhaps a friend or relative, I think I would start with The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage.

If you have been married for 10 years of more and serious issues and feelings have arisen, then you might start with Putting the Forever Back in Love.

Couples who have been married for 10 or 20 years are more likely to be having thoughts like "we don't have anything in common" or we stayed together for the kids and now they are off to college, so should we get divorced?" or "I'm unhappy and bitter about what he or she did and I can't forgive him." I address these sorts of questions directly in Putting the Forever Back in Love.

Of course you could also go ahead and get both The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage and also Putting the Forever Back in Love. They are both good reads and also good resources. (if you get one of my books, read it and would like the other book but can't afford it, send me an email and I will send you a pdf of the book for free.

If you have kids and have parenting issues, Putting the Forever Back in Love has some of my best parenting articles in it.

While on the subject of parenting, if you are having some real issues with your kids, and you've tried everything, why not try a little magic! I wrote a magical little book called Santa's Take on Parenting- Secrets from the North Pole. I don't talk about it much but probably should. Let Santa and Mrs. Claus mentor you on parenting. It's available in paperback and Kindle at Amazon.com and also in Barnes and Noble Nookbook.

If you want to give a book to someone - like The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage - and you suspect that this person might not read it right away, then get them the paperback version. That way, it can sit on the shelf, and one day, they might see it and pick it up and start reading.

Many of you want to know about talking to me. I prefer that you listen to me on the free audio and read some of my blog posts and articles first. Then get one or two of my books. Then, if you have a question or want some feedback, our time will be more productive. Contact me at my Liveperson virtual office. I'm available for livechat about 4 hours a day. It's nice to know that I'm around if you need me. So enjoy my writing and audio, and know that I've been around for 25 years.

Hello everyone. These are two books that I think you should have on your shelf (or on your computer, android or Kindle).

The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage is my most popular book and it covers the basic important stuff like no other book. If you just read one book on relationships, this is the one for you. If you are engaged and considering marriage, this is the one. If you are in a long term or short term relationship, and you are having some issues, get this book right away.

Putting the Forever Back in Love is a follow up to The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage.

Putting the Forever Back in Love has advanced strategies.

If you have been married for more than 10 years and your marriage is in trouble, this is the book you will want to read.

If you have kids and want to have some advanced insights and strategies for parenting, then Putting the Forever Back in Love is definitely going to be on your shipping list.

Now here is the good part!

Remember that I have a long standing offer. You can get any one of my eBooks sent to you by email as a token of my appreciation when you make a donation of any amount.

Many people don't know that I am a volunteer. I buy the airtime and internet time in order to be there to help people. Soooooo, any donation (yes, even a small one like $2 or $5 is really appreciated by me).

So to take advantage of this offer, get a free eBook, and help keep this blog going--all at the same time--just click here and choose a book.

Look inside and preview, then make a donation at safe and secure Paypal and you will get your gift eBook right away!!!

Hello, my name is Roland. I've been on the radio for almost 25 years, both secular stations and Christian stations around the country.

I get a lot of questions about relationships and marriage--probably most of the questions I get.

I know about the high cost of divorce. it happened to my mom and step dad. Before the divorce she was doing well financially. After the divorce she lived out her life in relative poverty. But even worse, I know about the psychological costs, the health costs, the emotional costs and the spiritual costs. I know how divorce affects the kids.

A couple of years ago I wrote a book about marriage. It was excellent, but I wanted to take it to the next level.

I think that The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage really does fulfill my expectations. I wanted a book that is about marriage, and even though I am a bit old fashioned, I wanted the book to be inclusive. And it is.

People who are in long term or short term relationships will enjoy and benefit from my book just as much as couples who are formally married. I talk about some of the deep aspects of marriage, and I can explain why so many relationships have issues.

I also wanted at talk about dating and courtship (there is a difference), and why I favor courtship.

I wanted a book for ladies who are working on their relationship. But I also wanted it to be a book that men, especially thoughtful men who want to be good husbands and fathers, will feel comfortable with.

I wanted a book that is serious--a serious book about a serious and important topic. But I also wanted it to be fun--a good read, a page turner--and even funny in parts.

Finally I wanted to write a book that can be read again and again. Each time getting some new insight. Or a book that a young man or lady who is just married, and issues develop, can reach for and turn to the chapter on the issue, and get some insights and solutions.

I believe that this is the book.

Your friend, Roland

Why do couples argue?
How can we put the sparkle back in our marriage?
How can we communicate better?
I’m a Christian but my boyfriend is not.
What is the difference between courtship and casual dating?
My wife asked me to leave.
Why are men the way we are?
What does my wife want?
Can we reconcile?
My wife cheated on me – now what?

Based on over 20 years of counseling couples and answering questions on the radio. Roland tackles the tough questions with humor, discernment, and refreshing honesty. From the Garden of Eden to the 21st century, he’s got relationships covered.

Click here to preview the paperback edition at Amazon.com

"Roland, thank you so much for your book.
When I heard that you are a pastor, I hesitated to order it because I'm not into religion. But because I wanted to learn more about why I can't stop resenting my husband so much, I went ahead and got the book. I'm so glad that I did. The advice is very practical, and the book is filled with some beautiful spirituality too. I spent over a thousand dollars to register and fly to an out of town seminar I could have saved the thousand and got your book instead." Suzy - San Bernardino

"The perfect book for troubled couples with different type of problems . . .
I can assure it will be one of the better books I have ever read." review of The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage

Now The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage is available in Kindle!

In fact, you don't even need a Kindle reader. You can start reading it online seconds after you make the purchase at the Kindle Store.

Putting the Forever Back in Love - Advanced Concepts in Relationship Building

Click here to preview in the Kindle edition

This book contains advanced concepts for coping with and resolving difficult relationship issues.

If you liked The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage you will love this book.

Been married for many years and have some issues? This is the book for you.

Based in 24 years of research and counseling, Dr. Trujillo presents new insights and strategies for healing relationships and resolving stress and unhappiness. Partners, parents, couples considering marriage, and adult children of dysfunctional families will find both practical and spiritual principles to help them move forward to happiness. Relationships can be tough, but take heart. There are solutions. That's why I wrote this book.

Want Putting the Forever Back in Love in paperback? Click here to see it at Amazon

Get a free eBook, and help keep my blog going--all at the same time--just click here and choose a book. then make a donation at safe and secure Paypal and you will get your gift eBook right away!!!

Thank you for caring about your relationship.

Husband and Wife Argue All the Time - 22 Year Marriage Mentor Offers Advanced Concepts and Solutions

15:06:00 marriage counseling books newlyweds arguing save my marriage we argue all the time Add Comment

Josh and Kaitlin just had another big argument. This time the huge spat was over the toothpaste tube.

Last week they had a big argument over money. Two weeks ago the argument was over whether to have the window open or closed.

Each time she throws everything in his face. He clams up. Nothing is solved. Another layer is added to unfinished business and baggage from the past, which resurfaces the next time they argue.

To the untrained observer, it would appear that the issue was the toothpaste tube, money or the window. But to Dr. Roland Trujillo PhD, not so.

"The toothpaste tube is only the occasion for pent up hostility, suppressed angers and long standing unfinished business to burst forth."

Roland continues: "Here's the rest of the story. Josh comes home from work and sits down in front of the television. Kaitlin had been working all day and taking care of the kids. She feels unappreciated.

Josh can sense that she is angry about something, but he doesn't want to begin a conversation because he knows the dam will break and she will throw a long list of things in his face. So he avoids talking.

Josh stays home in the evening even though his friends want him to play cards with them. He is angry because she does not appreciate his sacrifice. Kaitlin complains that the repair he made in the bathroom is not working so she is going to have to call someone else to do it who knows what they are doing. Josh feels like she does not respect him.

Kaitlin wants to talk. She hopes the maybe when thy go to bed, they can talk like they used to. Josh falls asleep right away. Kaitlin feels unloved.

Kaitlin admits to her friend that she tends to throw everything at him all at once. He probably feels overwhelmed says her friend. I know, says Kaitlin, but I can't help it. I keep trying to get his attention."

And once she does, everything that she has been holding in comes out. Afterwards she feels guilty about it.

Josh tells his friends that he loves his wife, but "she is never satisfied with anything I do." "I'm always wrong."

Soon one or both of them are thinking: "I'm tired of arguing. I'm tired of not being appreciated. I'm tired of being the one who has to work on our marriage. I'm tired of always giving in for peace. We have nothing in common. The love is gone."

Here's the bottom line, says Roland. Kaitlin is resentful. And so is Josh. It is the resentment that causes the accumulation of hurt feelings and hostility. The accumulation of upset leads to either exploding in anger or suppressing and clamming up. Neither is healthy.

Resentment washes away reason. Resentment takes away the ability to be reasonable and calm. It leads to frustration and upset. These lead to discouragement, feeling tired, negative thinking, stress and physical symptoms that stress contributes to.

I can help, says Roland. By learning to let go of resentment, you stop upset, frustration, bitterness, discouragement and all the other negative symptoms and feelings. It is also resentment that makes you feel empty.

Roland's practical solutions are based in understanding. "I describe the why of what is happening. I talk about men and women, about how they are different and about the common mistakes we make. Understanding is the answer. And when you become aware of what is really going on and see many good reasons for letting go of resentment, your new understanding will help you feel better and become more joyous and positive.

If your partner also develops understanding, then your relationship can become heaven on earth. If only you become more aware and mature in your understanding, you are still much better off because you will be able to deal gracefully with situations, and spare yourself the upset, frustra

tion and emptiness you now feel.

Another thing, says Roland. Many people know they are resentful and want to give it up, but don't know how. I know how, and I show you.

Other people think that being more forgiving means giving in for peace. But I can show you that it is resentment and guilty that makes you keep quite or give in now. I can show you how to let go of resentment, which frees you up to express yourself and speak up (without resentment).

What I teach should be common knowledge, but you can hardly get these insights anywhere else. Sure there are some good marriage and relationship programs or counseling. The seminar leaders, writer or counselor may be working with bits and pieces of the solution. But I have the whole and I put it all together. With others, you get some pieces of the jigsaw puzzle, but I can give yo the complete picture.

It is not for everyone though. Some people just want to hang onto resentment and judgment. And as long as they are unwilling to give them up, they are not ready for understanding. But when they are ready, my teachings are a God sent.

New! The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage is now available in quality paperback at our Amazon.com eStore.

The price for this 315 page book is $14.50. A portion of all eStore sales is donated to help homeless pets at animal shelters. The rest helps Roland help others. Buy now.

For a donation of any amount, get The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage in pdf. format as a token of our appreciation.

Roland Trujillo, author, lecturer, marriage coach,
and author introduces his new comprehensive look at the delights,

the challenges and the mysteries of marriage.

For over 20 years, Roland has been helping couples repair their relationships and move forward to optimal living.

Roland is now bringing his insights, based in compassion and spiritual principles, to a
new level in this unique look at the perils, pitfalls, and promises of relationships.

Why do we argue? How can I be more forgiving? Does divorce affect the kids? Can I save my marriage? My wife cheated on me-now what? My husband annoys me. Can we reconcile?

This long awaited book answers these questions and more. For years, listeners have thrilled to hear Roland on the radio. Now his advice for couples is crystallized in this unique look at relationships. Roland talks about the “how” of loving, forgiving, and reconciling. He will help you understand how resentment blocks love, and how to become unblocked.

Roland even explains how the ancient story of Adam and Eve is still repeated in homes today. This book is for anyone interested in relationships, why they get in trouble, and how to repair them

The Myths and Mysteries of Marriage - making relationships work.

318 pages of insights and solutions

Written by Dr. Roland Trujillo PhD in Pastoral Psychology and based on 20 years of counseling and coaching couples

Here are just some of the topics discussed

The Dating and Mating Game Is Not a Game
“A Rose by Any Other Name is Still a Rose”
Why I Decided to Become a Pastor
Where to Find Real Solutions to your Relationship Woes
Why Couples Argue
Myths of Marriage
Sex in Marriage – The Shocking Truth
How to Forgive and Forget
How to Apologize and Clear the Air with Dignity
Just How Important is Dad?
Marriage Counseling for Men
Can I Reconcile with My Husband, Wife, or Child?
Is Food Your Secret Lover and Enabler?
Dealing with Hard Times
Adam & Eve: The First Dysfunctional Family
My Husband is Annoying
My Wife Asked Me to Move Out –What Should I
Do?
Advice to Divorced Moms
My Wife Cheated on Me – Now What?
Finding the Best Marriage Advice – Trust Your Instincts
The Strong Family—Ten Lessons in Faithfulness

Purchase at Amazon.com in quality paperback for $14.95

Preview and purchase at Kindle! and download to your kindle or mobile device for $9.95

Preview at Scribd and purchase to download to your computer or mobile device for $9.95. Save 33% off paperback

Got a budget? Want to help Pastor Roland? For a donation of $5.00 we will send you this 315 page book in pdf. as a token of our appreciation. Click here to look inside or donate to help Roland